I’m a woman with a STEM PhD, and several of the guys I’ve dated have decided to prove they are smart enough to date me by looking up my publications from grad school (20 years ago now), reading them, and then trying to impress me by trying to poke holes in them or otherwise making me defend them on the spot.
That tactic is now an instant method to get me to end contact. It betrays a deep insecurity with my having expertise greater than theirs on any topic, even ones I have decades of work in. No Jimmy, you can’t become my peer by reading a few papers. I don’t think you are dumb, but I’m not spending time with you to massage your ego about your insecurity. Byyyye
I’m a woman with a STEM PhD, and several of the guys I’ve dated have decided to prove they are smart enough to date me by looking up my publications from grad school (20 years ago now), reading them, and then trying to impress me by trying to poke holes in them or otherwise making me defend them on the spot.
That tactic is now an instant method to get me to end contact. It betrays a deep insecurity with my having expertise greater than theirs on any topic, even ones I have decades of work in. No Jimmy, you can’t become my peer by reading a few papers. I don’t think you are dumb, but I’m not spending time with you to massage your ego about your insecurity. Byyyye